homesick

i feel so homesick right now its almost 4 am and i cant sleep i miss my parents, the ocean the mountians my fav stores places to eat and friends mostly it almost christmas and i am 2000 miles form 'home'

it sucks

i know i am here in wisconsin, which btw us getting very cold, for a reason i just dont seem to know what that reason is...i have a job its not the best in the world and tecnically im not even making min wage cuz im under 20 at the moment =( so im working and still have no cash i got paid 2 days ago and my entier pay is gone i hate being an adult some times i still want to go back to school but everyday that seems more and more hopeless i just feel like crying and on top of everything else my sister is driving me more crazyt than usual and i cant seem to get any of my lego project ideas to work out right

yep things suck

and yet i know that it will all work out one way or another because with god nothing is impossible
i dunno how but everythings going to be ok! i am just having a very hard time remembering that right now

i cant help but feel like i just want to go home but at the same time i like it here i just feel like such a outsider every where i go it drives me crazy!
i dunno what im doing with my life why does it seem like everyone has a plan or atleast are doing cool things while i work a crappy job and hang out at my apartment with nothing betterr todo

ok i think i am done ranting for now i think its time to try and sleep considering i dunno if its late or early atm and i might get called in to work tomarrow =/

if anyone actually reads this sorry for ranting...

life is crazy, god is great!

ok so since the last time i updated this little piece of cyber space i got to go home and visit mom and dad and nwbrickcon, all-in-all a awesome 2.5 weeks, but i was happy to be back in the middle of nowhere Wi, kinda strange for me i thought i would keep missing home more and it would be hard being here but i realized i really do enjoy the slower pace and not living in a 100,000+ populated city surrounded by more citys. i also came back (to 'new home') to find my room had gone from a air mattress and a cardbord box-turned-table in to a bed, curtians a cool chair, and a warm fuzzy blanket my sis MADE for me! it was so awesome, beautiful and sweet...and yes if u where wondering my sis does infact work at a craft store =) it also happend to work out that a relitive of ours was moving out this way from the nw and brought our stuff in the back of her moving truck....wow just wow...we had no idea how we where going to be able to get the rest of our stuff here and poof! i am useing one of many, many boxes for a footrest as i type! on top of all that we had no idea how we where going to pay rent this month cuz my bro-in-law keeps getting his already small amout of hours cut back and i still dont have a pay check however we all did our best to not worry or as God puts it so well DO NOT FEAR and we just kept prayin and believin and doin the best with what we had and in a weeks time we got a coupon for a free, yep ya herd me free family sized pizza then two diffrent people that we know and havent talked to in months where like hey somethin (or someone...ahem god maybe?) told me yall could use some help and poof! rent has been paid! yea a hudge OMGOSH was pretty much how i felt and nobody had said anything about our finances being that tight to either one of those people so again let me say God is great!!! not that everyday hasnt been crazy, diffuicult or down right hard cuz they have been but things are working out in great ways. oh and another thing i got a job!!!!!!!!! so what if its in the food court at the mall its still a paying gig and i start on monday =) =) =) =) and no it doesnt invovlve the phrase 'do u want fries with that' lol so hopefully by the time next months rent is do we will have the hours between us to cover it and still pay for all the other things llike gee i dunno food and electricity...kinda important in my book =) so short story...still short believe it or not...some times it feels like life completly sucks but stay faithful and do your best to not freak out every time some little thing goes wrong and every thing will work out cuz God is great =)
~sarah

luke 1:37

so here i sit at 330 am, i should be sleeping but i just cant seem to get my brain to shut up tonight, i keep wondering and worrying about things like 'when am i going to get a job? will i ever get to goto college? what am i sapoosed to do with my life? will i ever make new friends? because right now i feel like i have acoplished nothing worth while and its a sucky feeling. i finished highschool as a homeschooled student so i have no GPA or diploma to show for my hard work, i moved away from the few friends i have, i worked my butt off this summer 2000 miles away from home at cub scout camp and still no one seems to want to higher me, i am beging to wonder if i really was saposded to move so far away...maybe i should just go home not for just two weeks like im planning but just move back to washington...

however that would be doinng the easy thing (or atleast easyer) and one thing i have learned is that doing the 'safe' or 'easy' thing rarly pays off like when you have accomplished something that seems impossible that is just something i have a hard time remembering on most days. one of my favorite bands last cd was titled expect the impossible (if ya dont know stellar kart check um out!) and that title didnt make much sence at first but when i got the cd i noticed in a small space was the refrence luke 1:37 so i grabed my bible to see what it said and this is what i found
"FOR WITH GOD NOTHING WILL BE IMPOSSIBLE" and that is just what i have to keep repeting to my brain over and over when it just wont shut up, some times i even have to out loud tell my self 'dont worry everything will work out like it is saposed to, nothing is impossible with God!'

anywho to anyone out there who might actually read this thanks for letting me rant a lil bit, it helps alot. and also sorry for the terrible spelling/grammer i never was very good at it definatly more of a numbers brain...

oh lookie its a blog!

so this is my first attempt at blogging and i have no particular reason or theme for this little bit of web space so hopefully it doesn't stay to lame!

i do have a question for any home schooled people out there, i just finished my last year of high school and never attended a traditional school so i have no diploma transcript or sat scores and i want to attend college but have no idea where to start! about a year ago i did not want to go to college and kinda blew it off now i realize my stupidity and really want to go to college in the not to distant future but have no idea where to start HELP!!!